My latest counts with normal ranges in parenthesis (not too shabby eh?):
WBC 2.9 (3.5-12.5 K/uL)
RED BLOOD CELLS 3.68 (3.60-5.10 M/uL)
HEMOGLOBIN 11.2 (11.5-15.0 g/dL)
HEMATOCRIT 34.5 (34.0-46.0%)
MCV 94 (80-100 fL)
RDW, RBC 16.3 (11.9-14.3%)
PLATELETS COUNT 86 (140-400 K/uL)
NEUTROPHILS %, AUTOMATED COUNT 73 (41-81%)
LYMPHOCYTES %, AUTOMATED COUNT 23 (13-46%)
MONOS %, AUTO 3 (4-12%)
EOSINOPHILS %, AUTOMATED COUNT 0 (0-4%)
BASOPHILS %, AUTOMATED COUNT 0 (0-1%)
NEUTROPHILS, ABSOLUTE, AUTOMATED COUNT 2.1 (2.1-7.7 K/uL)
First, thank you so much for your words of encouragement. I apologize for not blogging sooner. I know what it feels like to check a blog multiple times a day to see if a fellow cancer fighter has made any updates after announcing some bad news. It sucks feeling left in the dark when you are worried for a friend. Just know I immensely appreciate your love and support (and patience).
Discovering that I had relapsed just 4 days after moving back home was quite surreal and scary. After numerous tests in Seattle showed that I was cancer free, what are the odds that on the very day I was flying home to San Francisco my final blood draw at the Hutch would show 30 stinking leukemia cells?! Impeccable timing! 
I really thought someone up there was playing an evil trick on me.
Of course, I’m a realistic person. There’s that voice in the back of your head that reminds you could relapse any time, but that voice was getting quieter by the day as I was nearing my 100 day post transplant mark. Not only was the relapse news devastating, but I was also dealing with headaches, nausea, diarrhea, and new red spots on my skin. I felt like I had just been through the hardest battle of my life and I was absolutely exhausted. I felt like my body had failed not only me, but all of my loved ones that had put so much energy into my cancer journey. I didn’t want to drag them through all of this again.
So that’s where I was just a few weeks ago, but now that we sort of have a short term treatment plan (a.k.a. taper off the immuno suppressant meds so my new immune system can grow and do some Leukemia ass kicking), I’m doing much better. Tapering off the meds have not triggered any major GVHD. I am not taking any systemic steroids either. All of my blood counts have been pretty stable. (*I did get 3 units of blood last Wednesday, but that’s pretty much been the trend. I was also getting blood transfusions every 3 weeks or so in Seattle.) Over the past few weeks, my spots have healed, my nausea has practically disappeared, my headaches are almost gone and my energy has increased. Most importantly, I feel mentally and physically strong.
I am almost done tapering off my last immuno suppressant, Cyclosporine. In 3 weeks I will get another bone marrow biopsy to see what’s going on and we will take it from there. Many decisions will have to be made in about a month, but I am just focusing on each day as they come. Right now, I am enjoying the fantastic weather, laughing with my sister Mel, snuggling with Van, getting back massages from Mom, playing board games with friends, watching Vietnamese kungfu movies, and chasing Marshawn around the dog park.
Life is A-OK.
P.S. A relapse is devastating to the entire Leukemia community not only because we are sad for the patient, but also because it shows that the disease can come back. I just wanted to remind anyone who’s going through treatment, that each person’s cancer journey is different. Please don’t attach my relapse to your life. Keep the hope alive. You can totally be cured of this stupid disease. And hey, I’m still banking on nipping Leukemia in the bud too.
43 responses so far ↓
1 A Fan // Mar 31, 2009 at 9:31 pm
You courage is motivating to many. Staying so strong while fighting cancer overshadow the rest of our problems and teach us to appreciate every moment of life. Thank you for this priceless lesson. I wish you the best in kicking leukemia’s ass!
2 Sarah in Pittsburgh // Mar 31, 2009 at 9:32 pm
Yay Michelle! So glad you are feeling better and enjoying yourself.
3 Jenny // Mar 31, 2009 at 10:02 pm
Way to go Michelle! You are such a strong fighter! I will always be cheering you on! GO MICHELLE!!!!
4 Shannon // Mar 31, 2009 at 10:15 pm
Michelle, you are so strong and so thoughtful of others. Thanks for the update, our thoughts are with you and Van and family!
5 lany // Mar 31, 2009 at 10:22 pm
glad you are feeling better and you will nip leuk in the bud!
6 Christine Y // Mar 31, 2009 at 10:24 pm
i’m so glad to read that you are feeling so much better! and i know that being home and with all the people you love and who love you will give you even more strength to kill those leuk cells. i’m thinking of you every day and sending you happy and healthy vibes!
7 KD // Mar 31, 2009 at 11:17 pm
Relieved to hear you in good spirits again! Go Michelle!!
8 tdb // Mar 31, 2009 at 11:43 pm
YOU ARE AWESOME
9 Samantha MacRae // Apr 1, 2009 at 12:53 am
You are a star Micheel ! So lovely to hear your “voice”
I know you can do this.
Sam xx
10 tonya traylor // Apr 1, 2009 at 5:02 am
God Bless You!!!
11 Ann Gregory // Apr 1, 2009 at 7:36 am
Keep fighting girlie!
12 Nancy Sakakura // Apr 1, 2009 at 10:44 am
You have a great disposition and attitude. Keep it up Michelle. I’m hoping the new immune system will totally annihilate the leukemic cells!!
I’m visualizing little new pacmans eating the bad cells up!!! Give it a try… it’s kind of fun…
13 Linh // Apr 1, 2009 at 10:49 am
those numbers are looking woo woo good! and i didn’t know there were such things as vietnamese kung fu movies haha.
14 Crystal // Apr 1, 2009 at 2:00 pm
I am so glad you are feeling better! Can’t wait to see you!
15 Myling // Apr 1, 2009 at 5:18 pm
I’m so glad to hear you’re doing much better! You’re right.. I was one of those people who kept checking your blog for any updates profusely!
16 Myling // Apr 1, 2009 at 5:21 pm
I’m also glad to see your hematocrit is up too!
17 Valerie // Apr 1, 2009 at 8:09 pm
YAY! Thanks for the update Michelle – glad you’re feeling better! Keep up the good work! XOXO
18 Tony // Apr 1, 2009 at 8:22 pm
you need to watch some quality chinese kung fu movies! Glad you’re feeling better!
19 Bryan C // Apr 1, 2009 at 9:12 pm
just like you to be thinking of others over yourself and to end with an encouraging message to other patients…
maykin, you’re wonderful and selfless.
love,
bryan
20 Anonymous // Apr 1, 2009 at 9:44 pm
So glad you’re doing better!! Even though I’ve never met you I feel like I’m a friend of yours! Good luck and I’m hoping the next blog will bring more good news…my prayers are with you.
21 Amitha // Apr 1, 2009 at 11:03 pm
You know, when you posted that story about how your mom found time to babysit the children of other patients while in Seattle, I thought “Wow, what a hero!”. I mean, it is really difficult to find it in oneself to help and support other people when one is going through a tough time themselves. I wasn’t surprised when you ended this post with a shout-out and words of encouragement to other patients. Clearly, your mother’s kind selflessness has been passed along to you. Just know that you are a hero to many people, even those who have never met you (like myself).
22 Drew Noel // Apr 1, 2009 at 11:30 pm
You’re amazing! My thoughts have been with you and Van over the past months and I am driving to the Vietnamese Martyrs’ Church here in Sacramento tomorrow to meet with them on setting up a drive. My work colleague Chris is going to translate for me and I am in coordination with Annie Doan at AADP as we’ve been tagging on this. With some luck and good communication we’ll have a drive on Easter Sunday with hopefully over 1,000 people in attendance. We’re going for it out here in SacTown girl! You’re an inspiration to us all!
Much Love,
Puppy
23 Floyd Crame // Apr 2, 2009 at 6:19 am
You will beat this, Michelle! Keep up the fight and attitude. Your new immune system will do the job.
24 Emily // Apr 2, 2009 at 9:29 am
how did you know we were all checking your website everyday?!?!
it’s odd that in this situation where you are the patient, the people who are rooting for you often look to YOU for strength. your optimism and fantastic attitude is something that i take comfort in, because as long as you have the courage to fight with all of us behind you, there is no obstacle too great. BEAT CANCER!
25 Stacie Tamaki // Apr 2, 2009 at 10:32 am
Hi Michelle, I was so sorry to read about your relapse but am very glad you are feeling better and up for kicking some ass. You may have heard about me from Van and Crystal but I wanted to let you know directly that as I help my cousin find a marrow donor I’d like to do anything I can to help you at the same time so please just let me know if you have any ideas of how I can help ok?
26 Cindi // Apr 2, 2009 at 3:33 pm
Michelle…I have been following your story for quite some time. I was devastated to read your recent news and continue to keep you in my prayers. I recently just finished treatment for Ewing’s sarcoma and I completely understand the emotional roller coaster you and your loved ones have been on. I admire your great attitude and your incredible strength. Asking others who are fighting this horrific disease not to be scared by your relapse is so very kind of you. You seem to be always thinking of others. I will pray that your next bone marrow biospy shows that your immune system is kicking “c”’s butt!!!
27 Kimberly // Apr 2, 2009 at 3:48 pm
Hi Michelle,
You inspire us every day with the strong will to kick Luke in the ass. You and the entire family are in our prayers.
28 carol lai // Apr 2, 2009 at 5:09 pm
thanks for the update. your strength encourages me and i pray that your spirits will remain high and that you heal.
29 Molasses Minds // Apr 2, 2009 at 7:07 pm
Guilty of check the site multiple times a day looking for updates. Just wanted to say my thoughts & prayers are with you. Just believe you can beat this. I BELIEVE you can kick this in the BUTT!!!
30 Janice // Apr 2, 2009 at 9:51 pm
GOOOOO MICHELLE!!! Glad to see you are back in action and in your element to kick Leuk’s butt! Keep encouraging those new stem cells! And as always, I will keep sending my positive energy your way =) Love you!
31 AMP // Apr 2, 2009 at 10:21 pm
You go girl! Keep that positive energy flowin’. Leuk won’t be able to stand a chance.
32 Suzanne // Apr 3, 2009 at 4:55 pm
Hi Michelle, I am so glad u are feeling better, after my son Alex’s BMT he went to ICU with an infection and 0 neutro. he made it Michelle, there are miracles everyday, u are one, keep hope and faith, Love Suzanne
33 Rick // Apr 3, 2009 at 11:37 pm
86k platelets is awesome. Way to go! 86k platelets! Sigh of relief here. My doctor has said a lot in last couple years, “you have too many platelets to have cancer.” You’re luke is trying making a last ditch effort to survive, and is on its way out the door. “Don’t get hit in the ass on way out door luke.” Once they get they get your immuno-suppression balanced, you’ll be up and up.
My doctors always told me…
-side note web guys can we make this text field bigger?
34 Agnes // Apr 4, 2009 at 2:51 am
Hi Michelle
So wonderful to see that you are writing. You are an inspiration to so many people. The most important thing is to to take care of yourself first. We love you so much. Many, many kisses from your team in Spain.
35 Carol // Apr 4, 2009 at 9:37 pm
Fantastic! Keep up the good fight, stay positive and we’ll keep fighting on our end. Many more Vietnamese donors are going to workup because of you and PM’s efforts. It is wonderful to be part of all this. Stay positive and enjoy the sunshine
36 Bari // Apr 5, 2009 at 11:02 pm
did you ever know that youre my hero….
have i told you lately that i loved you?
ok enough with the sappy songs!
YOU ROCK MICHELLE and kick that cancer in the ass!
37 Ide // Apr 6, 2009 at 7:33 pm
I can hear the Rocky theme song playing “getting strongerrrrr!” =D
<3
Ide
38 Ed Collins // Apr 7, 2009 at 11:47 am
Wonderful news. Can’t wait to see you and Marshawn at the dog park:)
39 Steve // Apr 7, 2009 at 5:34 pm
Great to hear you’re feeling better! Hope those baby stem cells can do their job and kill Leuk.
40 Carol // Apr 7, 2009 at 7:01 pm
Hi Michelle! Thank you for the update. You are such an inspiration! I wish we could all be mirrors so we could reflect back to you the courage that you model every day. Be strong and fearless! Rock on, you’re a rock star!
41 Huy // Apr 7, 2009 at 11:29 pm
Hi Michelle,
I’ve been meaning to write to you since the setback, but I was lost. Didn’t know what to say, and didn’t know how to feel. It’s certainly sad news.
But no matter the odds, please keep on fighting. We have so many things to do together when you get better. I have so many stories from Vietnam.
Miss you and love you
42 Suresh Ramasamy // Apr 10, 2009 at 11:08 am
If you get a chance look the following links.
http://www.emofree.com/Articles/cancer-turnaround.htm
http://www.emofree.com/Articles2/uterine-cancer-reversal.htm
http://www.emofree.com/articles/cancer-consistent-tapping.htm
43 Marcia // Apr 14, 2009 at 1:38 am
Thinking of you and sending positive thoughts and prayers- You are an inspiration to me and a lot of others, keep fighting. You are going to beat this – love marcia
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