1. The mask is quite tight and can become suffocating if you get overwhelmed or claustrophobic (and I’m normally never claustrophobic). The plastic mask feels like a hard plastic net.

2. The mask gets locked into the board under your head, so you are extremely constrained and totally strapped in by your head. The mask is so tight that it leaves indentation on my forehead and face when it’s removed.

3. I tried to visualize I was at a sunny beach or a tanning bed because there are flashes of light when the radiation turns on. It’s reminds me of a blinding camera flash.

4. The smell of the radiation flash is a sickening metallic stench. Just thinking about the smell makes my stomach quiver. I asked the radiation technician if this is a common complaint and he said yes the radiation affects your olfactory glands. They put some strawberry scented tape on my mask right above my nose. It helps a little, but whenever the radiation turns on, even when I’m not breathing in I can smell it. I think it helps when I breath out at the exact moment that the radiation begins.

5. I have to keep my chin way up the entire time and it gets sore. My teeth clench and my jaw gets sore. The board that my head rests on is extremely hard and my head gets sore. Basically, it’s not comfortable. The dry run I was in the mask for an hour and a half. The 1st day I was locked in for another hour and a half as they were taking more x-rays and giving me radiation in between. The 2nd day, the technicians promised it was going to only be 20 minutes, but the machine broke down midway through my session. All in all, it took about 2 hours to complete my session. Thankfully, the 3rd and 4th round were only 30 minutes.

6. Closing my eyes with my head tilted way up makes me feel like I’m spinning. So I keep my eyes open.

7. Radiation makes me nauseous and gives me a headache. I really thought the first few days would be a walk in the park. I had these grandiose ideas of whizzing through radiation. My how I was wrong! I immediately felt sick within the first hour of radiation. It was hard to keep food down in the beginning, but the radiation oncologist prescribed Dexamethazone (steroid) which reduces the swelling of my brain and makes me less nauseous. It’s been a day since I started the ‘roids, and I haven’t puked so it must be helping. The nausea is still there, but it’s not as bad.

8. Only 2 more days of the cranial spinal radiation! The doctors are reminding me that it’s going to get much tougher for the next few weeks. Gulp…here I come!